Anticipations

“Don’t live your life in anticipation”

Are the words of the century

“Be here now, in the present”

Are the words always echoing

But anticipation is always present

Infiltrating my being, taking me out of the present

My mind constantly slips to hindsight and anticipation

I find joy in the rumination

There’s a party tonight

What am i going to wear

How shall i prepare, how do I do my hair?

I have to go to work

What a drag

I’ll go to sleep early, i must be on time

What are we doing in class today

What are my thoughts

Another rhetorical analysis

I think that this is all dross

Cross country practice later

At least it’s sunny today

Oh, it’s a workout

800s cause me dismay

In 10 solid minutes i get to go to band

What will happen today

Will my friends make me laugh

“Go in to the situation with no expectations”

But i always find myself dancing on the line of squirming anticipation

When I’m in class, bored, writing the time in spanish for the 40th time

My mind starts to wander, embracing my future, arranging my days in line

And if you’re constantly in the present, in the moment, taking your shot

How do you set goals, keep yourself going, crawl out of the box

Because it’s a lot easier to be in the moment when it’s charged with emotion

Wading through the water, dealing with the commotion

When i’m surrounded by people

My mind can engage

Brought into the now

Not thinking of how

When or why things will happen ahead

I’m in my element, with my friends

Or driving on the road

Or focusing on a poem

These are the places where my mind gets to focus

I narrow in on the people I have there

My mind is blank yet full, I have not a care

But when it’s all quiet and boring and lame

Where does your mind go if not to your past shame

Or your pride or your excitement or future anticipation

Where does your mind go

If it’s not preparation